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From: Robin David
Date: 02/22/02
Time: 08:04:32 AM
Hi Lee!
I think it's a good thing you're not refluxing. Otherwise, "Doing the Fundo" would have been for naught. "Doing the Fundo," sounds like a dance craze, skateboard move, or aerial skiing maneuver, doesn't it? That's it! "Doing the Fundo" will be a new GERD Olympic event. The participants will twist, turn, flip, get inside out and outside in. Commentator: "Well Jim, what did you think of Lee's last Fundo?" "Gee Mike, I'd have to give her a 10 overall. Her poise was excellent and that wrap looks perfect!"
Anyway, if it's reflux you want, here are some diet suggestions:
A pitcher of margaritas (heavy on the Rose's lime juice)
Three (3) helpings of "8 Alarm" Chili (Include tons of onions and garlic. Double the pinto beans.)
And for dessert, a extra big helping of "Killer Chocolate" - two fudge brownies atop a pint of chocolate ice cream, smothered in chocolate sauce and topped off with white chocolate shavings (approx. 6 ounces) and 6 Hershey Kisses.
As a digestif, may I recommend a full snifter of French cognac and three shots of Ouzo.
(Don't forget to brush with peppermint toothpaste before you go to bed.)
As for sleeping (not really part of the diet) make sure the foot of your bed is raised to approximately 45 degrees. The blood may run to your head but at least you'll give the acids somewhere to go.
If none of this works, I'd say that Jelly Bean in your esophagus should be removed and fitted with a small brooch-like pin. That way, you could wear it on your lapel as a badge of honor. Bravo, ;) - Robin